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Plans to share room hit snag over snoring

Published: Thursday, Sept. 4, 2014 1:15 a.m. CST

Dear Abby: My son's out-of-town wedding is coming up. My mother will attend and be traveling with me. I am single, and my mom is also single. She's planning on sharing a room with me.

Abby, my mom has a severe snoring problem, and I'm a very light sleeper. I cannot sleep with a snorer! I don't want to ruin my time at my son's wedding, and she's upset about the added expense of another room, which neither of us can really afford, but I don't know what else to do. – Mother Of The Groom

Dear Mother Of The Groom: The separate room may be a luxury you can't "really afford," but incurring the expense may be worth it so you won't sleepwalk through your son's wedding. I'm not recommending earplugs because, while they may dull the racket, they won't completely eliminate the sound of severe snoring.

P.S. If your mother's physician doesn't know about her snoring, it should be discussed so the doctor can make sure it isn't a symptom of a serious health problem.

Dear Abby: My son has two children who are in temporary foster care, and has visitation with the ex's stepsister, who got the right to grant visitation. Recently we had a birthday party for them. All the grandparents, aunts and uncles were invited. It was a kiddie party, of course, and I jumped into the pool and played with the children. We had a ball!

A few weeks later, I heard the stepsister's mother had said I had "no business" playing in the pool with the kids. I was taken aback. Isn't that what grandmas are for? I love playing with the little ones.

Was I wrong for not "acting my age"? Did I make a fool of myself? The custody fight is ongoing and I don't want to do anything that would jeopardize my son winning custody. – Worried in New York

Dear Worried: I don't think you did anything inappropriate. I suspect the stepsister's mother was jealous that she wasn't the person in the pool, which is why she didn't speak up during the party and you had to hear it weeks later secondhand.

Dear Abby: On July 31 you printed my question about throwing a 25th anniversary party for my parents. I want to let you know that instead of taking on an expensive dinner that I can't afford right now, I'm collaborating with a cousin to have a chef come into their home to prepare a nice meal for them and the people who participated in their wedding. I felt it was a much more personal and cost-effective way to give them the nice anniversary they deserve. Thank you for your advice! – Son Of Silvers

Dear S.O.S.: I'm delighted you wrote to share your solution. The idea is terrific. I am sure your parents will be thrilled and other readers will appreciate your ingenuity.

Thank you!

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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