Two-plate special: How to downsize your cooking when the kids leave home

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It was the milk that first got my attention.

At the end of the week, there was still some left, a final cup or so sloshing around the bottom of the jug.

Then I started to notice more subtle signs: The lunch meat that stayed in the meat drawer. The bread that didn’t disappear faster than I could say “inhale.” The peanut butter — oh, the luxury of peanut butter that was right there in its jar when I needed it.

It finally started to sink in: I’m an empty nester now. A family cook with no family to feed.

But I am still a cook, someone who needs — even craves — time in the kitchen. So how do I adjust to this new life? How do I become a serves-two cook in a serves-six world?

I needed advice. So I turned to Ben and Karen Barker, who downsized a lot more than their own kitchen last year. They closed their award-winning restaurant, the Magnolia Grill in Durham, so they could spend more time with their grown sons and grandchildren.

“It’s mundane on the surface, but dramatically wonderful,” Ben said.

They still cook every day, Karen insists. A winner of the James Beard Foundation’s award for the nation’s best pastry chef, she doesn’t bake much these days. But she’ll often make a batch of pizza dough so she and Ben can split a small pizza with a salad a couple of times a week.

And Ben, who once ran his restaurant’s walk-in refrigerator as “a no-waste facility,” has learned to go to the Carrboro Farmers Market and only come back with a couple of zucchini or a single bunch of kale.

“We think in two- to three-day clips,” Karen says. “It’s planned, but it leaves a little room for spontaneity.”

Learning to shop

It’s difficult to know for sure how many of us cooking for two are empty nesters who have to adjust after cooking for families. But it’s a good bet that the 76 million members of the baby boom generation, who are now between 52 and 65, are having an effect.

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