Wife needs to explain her flirtatious behavior
Dear Annie: My wife of 27 years hugs and kisses everyone she meets, no matter how often she sees them. I have spoken to her about this, stating that not everyone is comfortable being hugged and kissed all the time.
My real problem is that we have a male friend who is also our tenant. “Ralph” is a huge flirt. Worse, he tells me all the time how sexy my wife is and how lucky I am to be married to her. Because Ralph lives in our building, we see him several times a week. He and my wife hug and kiss each time they say hello and goodbye. Their greeting seems a little different from the others.
I have spoken to my wife, letting her know it makes me uncomfortable, but she doesn’t seem to care. She says to “grow up and deal with it.” I do not want to argue, but I also don’t want to be uncomfortable every time we see Ralph. How can I get my point across without causing a war?
– Tired of Hugging
Dear Tired: You can ignore it and assume her hugging and kissing is only that or, if she is flirting with Ralph, that she doesn’t intend to do anything more about it. She probably enjoys seeing you react with such jealousy. You could behave the same way, but we don’t believe that would help. Instead, ask her to explain why she continues to deliberately make you uncomfortable and unhappy.
Dear Annie: As a former overweight person, I can tell “Want To Love Him” that nagging his father about his weight won’t do any good. Nagging only made me more stubborn.
My immediate family said nothing about my weight. After seeing some family photos that were not flattering, I made the effort to take off 50 pounds and kept them off for 10 years. This past year, I dropped another 30.
– Ready On My Own
Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. E-mail questions to anniesmailbox@comcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, P.O. Box 118190, Chicago, IL 60611.
