Mother-in-law needs to quit her outrageous behavior
Dear Annie: My husband and I have been happily married for 20 years. After the kids were grown, we decided to downsize. We put our home on the market and moved to a different state.
My husband’s mother did not want us to move. She started interfering with the real estate office that was showing our house. She was given written warnings to stay away from the property. She then stripped all our perennials and trellises and took the picnic table and hoses – anything she could get off the property. She left a huge mess, and I had to pay someone to clean it up.
She wouldn’t stop, so I finally called law enforcement. Now members of the family have labeled me “psycho” because I filed a complaint, but the local police haven’t done anything. Mom continues to arrive at showings and claims she is the caretaker. What can I do to stop this woman without breeding more ill will?
– Fed-Up Psycho
Dear Fed Up: Your mother-in-law’s behavior is outrageous. Where is your husband in all this? He should quite firmly inform his mother that her punitive and destructive actions must stop immediately or she risks estrangement from his family. It is obvious that she is so frightened and upset by your departure that she believes her only recourse is sabotage. You both need to reassure her that living elsewhere will not keep you from calling, writing and visiting often. If she is incapable of adjusting, however, suggest she get professional help. It sounds like she could use it.
Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. E-mail questions to anniesmailbox@comcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, P.O. Box 118190, Chicago, IL 60611.
