True love knows no age
Dear Annie: “Not Harold and Maude” wanted to hear from readers who are involved with younger men.
My husband is 18 years younger, and we’ve been married 15 years. My family had a little heartburn over it until they realized our commitment was genuine. My two adult children were skeptical, but came around when they realized he had my best interests at heart. His family members all have ghosts in their own closets and are generally nonjudgmental. Sometimes when I worry over a new wrinkle, he’ll say, “Honey, I could do younger, but I could never do better.” – Not Maude
Dear Not: Very sweet. We heard from many “cougars” and the men they married.
Read on:
From Sarasota, Fla.: My wife is 20 years older, and we’ve been married for 37 years. She is the best thing that ever happened to me.
Arizona: My husband is 15 years younger. My kids have been supportive, and to tell you the truth, most people don’t realize he’s that much younger.
South Dakota: I spent 10 years with a man 15 years my junior. When I needed open heart surgery, he didn’t want to take care of me. I’ve enjoyed good health since, but he developed prostate problems. When he found a younger woman and got her pregnant, I divorced him. Oh, and he totally ruined me financially.
New York: I am 72 and have been told I look 60. My husband is 51 and looks 10 years older. When we married 22 years ago, his mother cried and his 5-year-old daughter hated me. It wasn’t easy, but we discussed these problems and were prepared. My best friend told me he probably would only stay with me 5 years. I replied, “It will be worth it.”
Boston: My maternal grandparents married in 1912. The scandal was huge and included great-aunts fainting all over the place. She was 40 and he was 28. From all accounts, they were perfectly suited and lived a happy life. Go for it. Gifts are meant to be enjoyed.
Washington: My husband and I met when he was 20 and I was 46. We’ve been together 19 years. Yes, our friends and family were concerned and upset. We smiled and said we assumed people who cared for us would be pleased we were so happy.
Chicago: My two grown sons, ages 31 and 35, are both in successful long-term relationships with older women.
While I had to readjust my thinking about having biological grandchildren, I am proud that both sons play active roles in the lives of their partners’ children, and I make an effort to do the same.
Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. E-mail questions to anniesmailbox@comcast.net or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, P.O. Box 118190, Chicago, IL 60611.
